Since I’ve been to therapy, I have been going out everyday. I still have my moments, where my anxiety is there. However, I’ve been getting better. I don’t get as nervous about leaving the house, I’ve been able to eat out twice without any problems, I’ve been at least 30 mins away from my house and haven’t had problems. I do have my bad days though. Like yesterday, we were at the mall and everything was fine. I got hungry, so we got food at the food court and as soon as I took a bite out of the rice my anxiety started to say, “Hi, Theresa. I could show up more if you panic,” then my body said it wasn’t hungry. So, needless to say, I didn’t eat much of my dinner.
I’m a little scared, considering next week I am going to go completely off my meds for at least a month (or I’m going to try). I’m not so much nervous about if I have to go back on it, more scared about having a bad panic attack and not being able to handle it. I know I will be able to handle it and if I can’t I’ll go back on the medicine, however, that thought is in my mind. When I see my therapist next month (It takes me a few weeks to make progress sometimes so I schedule appoints at least every other week or more), I plan on seeing what she says about my current situation and asking too what these pills exactly do for me. I know that they don’t completely take away my anxiety (she told me this in a previous session and of course I had a few episodes while on this medicine), but I know it does something considering my doctor prescribed it and I didn’t have the anxiety I do right now (well not right now writing this, but you know what I mean).
This is a short update, considering I do have to go out at some point. Not sure where I’m going to go, which is the one bad part of having to go out everyday, but I’ll go somewhere cause again, I’m doing whatever I can to make sure I can cope with my anxiety.